The Grateful Game

Some days you have to play the Grateful Game just to stay on top. First, two things about gratitude from our own dear President Monson:

• Sincerely giving thanks not only helps us recognize our blessings, but it also unlocks the door of heaven and helps us feel God's love.
• If we reach deep enough and look hard enough, we will be able to feel and recognize just how much we have been given.

So here goes.

• I am grateful for the kind, wonderful people who give me rides to my appointments and wait with me while I navigate my full-time job of waiting. Today BD picked me up with a ginger ale (perfect for my rocking stomach) and some Hershey kisses (couldn't quite stomach them). Yesterday JB danced while I got a shot in my booty. I wish I could list all of them--these wonderful people. I have chemo-induced neuropathy in my toes which sort of scares me from driving safely. That and I'm just so tired that my reflexes are pretty bad. So safety first!
• I am grateful for people that bring me food. AS just brought me fajitas from Rio Grande--and I ate one! It's lasted a whole 30 minutes and counting! YM brought some Venezuelan deliciousness and made me eat before my regrettable Thursday chemo (which produced a bout of nausea and no appetite since then!). SB brought chicken noodle soup yesterday and crackers, always perfect for such occasions. And my sweet roommates have catered me with popsicles and potato chips--hey, you go with what you can stomach, right? And so so so many other treats and meals from so many people. Thank you.
• I am grateful for the people that come visit. Yesterday MCS came and brought her violin. It was so beautiful--and reminded me of my Grandad (and uncle Steve and cousin Arian) and just soothed my soul. The other might PP came and cooked dinner, then seriously cleaned my room. It feels so uncluttered and clean now. Then she rubbed my feet! Yesterday MA came and sat downstairs while I showered so I wouldn't miss the Fed-Ex guy. I could go on and on and on. I so appreciate these kind visits. Every day someone calls me to make sure I'm good.
  
• Hats! People have sent me the GREATEST hats ever! Oh I love them! I have beanies and knitted hats and fancy Sunday hats with feathers and bling. I have Brittney Spears hats and scarves and my bald, cold head thanks you. I feel so covered--both physically and emotionally. I can't explain what that means to me and my very vulnerable head. For some reason my head has been one of the hardest parts of this experience.
  
• I am grateful for books. People have sent old classics and new favorites. I have a stack of reading material--and I am so so so grateful for it. From spy girl detectives to Pulitzer Prize winners to C.S. Lewis to church books. I'm covered. I don't always feel like reading, but sometimes reading is the only thing I can do. It's the perfect escape. And the magazines! Thanks, friends.
• I am grateful for gifts of money. I have a really hard time wrapping my head around the generosity of so many people in so many different situations. Thank you. Thank you to the E family and the B family for sharing your Christmas with me. Thank you to the anonymous people. Thank you SB and SS for the Delta miles so my mom and grandmother could come for Christmas next week. Thank you for the countless people who send checks and cash. I can't express my gratitude--I just feel so taken care of. And so indebted. Thank you. I can handle the prescriptions and the gas and the food (ok, so I haven't been buying too much but I will the second I can think of something!), the rent and the bills. This is a whole new life for me.
• Thank you for the pajamas and lounge wear and socks. I think I have put on real pants four times in the past six weeks, and a skirt three times. And it was great to feel like a real person. But there is nothing like feeling warm and comfortable.
• And the quilts! I don't know what to say! Thank you JJ, JB, NS, AP, MR, RA. You pulled together a work of art in a matter of days and I love the bright orange and cheery green. Thank you LBC and AUS for the Union Jack delight--London Girls ARE forever. Thank you DW for the brown and yellow Ohio lovelies. Thank you JPH for the patriotic stripes. You have lifted my spirits and warmed my body. Thank you, ARH, for sending our fave family blanket. I know I need to upload pictures, but I just don't have the energy right now.
• Thank you for all the cards and emails and letters and phone calls and facebook messages and IMs and texts, for the sweet thoughts and uplifting inspiration. From the sister missionaries to the printed talks to the mix cds. I so wish I had the energy to respond to each and every one. It drives me nuts. Please know I read each and every one and feel your support and love. Thank you.
• Thank you VA for the beautiful Christmas nativity! Oh your work is so exquisite! Check it out here. I love it. It makes me shine.
  

I know there are things and people I have forgotten. I do, after all, have chemo-brain. But I have felt your love and prayers--you have fed me and covered me and warmed me and delivered me. I am so blessed. And I feel so indebted. And I feel to commit myself to feeding and covering, warming and delivering for the rest of the long life I have ahead of me.

All that he requires of you is to keep his commandments; and he has promised you that if ye would keep his commandments ye should prosper in the land; and he never doth vary from that which he hath said: therefore, if ye do keep his commandments he doth bless you and prosper you.

And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him.

And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever. (Mosiah 2:22-24)